Well, it didn't take long. School started on Tuesday and my daughter was bullied on Wednesday. With 1 in 4 children being bullied every single day at school and only 4% of adults responding to reports of bullying, I should not be surprised.
What did surprise me, however, was my daughter's reaction to the insults being hurled at her by a girl she barely knows. She decided to return the insults. Even though all last year we discussed "mommy approved" responses aimed at letting the bullies know that she would not be a push over target, she made a really bad decision that could only cause the situation to escalate.
It did not help that the boy (bystander) sitting between them egged them on with his blow by blow commentary. Yes, this happened in the classroom, in the front row no less, and the teacher was completely oblivious! Not for long, though. I will be calling her today so that she will be aware of it should it happen again.
I can see that educating myself and my daughter about bullying is going to be an on-going process. I realize that she is only human and that her anger got the best of her, but she needs to do a better job of not getting involved in the bullies tirade. My daughter's safety is my top priority. It is my job as a parent to educate my daughter and empower her against the bullies without making herself a bigger target.
Thursday, August 28, 2008
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
Contract For Internet Usage More Important Than Behavior To School
School started yesterday. The kids were so excited, they actually got up 45 minutes before I did! That ought to last about one more day, I'd say. Last night my kids came home with piles of paper from me to both review and sign. Being that I threw my back out earlier in the day, I was a captive audience.:(
As I sifted through the piles of papers sent home by the teachers, I was struck by the Internet Usage Contract to be signed by the parent and child. I wondered why there was no such contract regarding BEHAVIOR. Surely a contract for behavior is in order when every single teacher spelled out the requirement of RESPECT that each student must demonstate in class. Some teachers mentioned RESPECT more than twice!
I have been in a lot of grade school classrooms and have witnessed numerous children disrespect teachers and fellow students on a daily basis. The need to instill RESPECT in the classroom is vital to building an effective learning environment for our children. Given the lack of discipline at home, it is no wonder that kids today are so disrespectful of their teachers and friends. There is a great need for a Behavioral Contract at every level of education, with consequences for misbehavior clearly spelled out. So, I repeat. Where is the Behavioral Contract?
As I sifted through the piles of papers sent home by the teachers, I was struck by the Internet Usage Contract to be signed by the parent and child. I wondered why there was no such contract regarding BEHAVIOR. Surely a contract for behavior is in order when every single teacher spelled out the requirement of RESPECT that each student must demonstate in class. Some teachers mentioned RESPECT more than twice!
I have been in a lot of grade school classrooms and have witnessed numerous children disrespect teachers and fellow students on a daily basis. The need to instill RESPECT in the classroom is vital to building an effective learning environment for our children. Given the lack of discipline at home, it is no wonder that kids today are so disrespectful of their teachers and friends. There is a great need for a Behavioral Contract at every level of education, with consequences for misbehavior clearly spelled out. So, I repeat. Where is the Behavioral Contract?
Do Anti-bullying Policies Equal Hypocracy?
This is an interesting point of view put forth to me in a conversation yesterday out in front of my daughters' school. I think it really hits the nail on the head. A principal who will not get involved and enforce the anti-bullying policies put in place at his or her school is indeed a HYPOCRITE.
What's more, a principal who ignores the bullying because he or she thinks of bullying as a "normal" part of child development actually encourages playground violence, otherwise known as bullying.
We have got to stop the HYPOCRISY! That only 4% of adults take any action whatsoever when a victim reports being bullied is a NATIONAL DISGRACE! Teachers, principals, and parents should be ashamed of the statistics and of our lack of attention to this very MONUMENTAL PROBLEM in our school. What kind of message are we sending our kids? What kind of example are we setting?
What's more, a principal who ignores the bullying because he or she thinks of bullying as a "normal" part of child development actually encourages playground violence, otherwise known as bullying.
We have got to stop the HYPOCRISY! That only 4% of adults take any action whatsoever when a victim reports being bullied is a NATIONAL DISGRACE! Teachers, principals, and parents should be ashamed of the statistics and of our lack of attention to this very MONUMENTAL PROBLEM in our school. What kind of message are we sending our kids? What kind of example are we setting?
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Let The Bullying Begin!
By now, most of us have taken our greatest treasure, our children, back to school. If you are like me, you were full of hope and excitement for the new school year. However, knowing that 1 in 4 children are bullied every single day at school, I found myself filled with anxiety for what the bullies had planned for my youngest daughter.
As I watched my girls walk through the front gates, I ran into another mom leaving school after dropping off her daughter. We exchanged a welcome back hug. She said she was glad to be leave the "clique run" elementary school and principal behind. I was surprised to hear her express the same things my family had experienced at that school. I, too, was glad to leave that school behind, but the bullies from that school have come with us.
This year will be different for a lot of reasons. We are also prepared for whatever the bullies throw at us. We will not tolerate their continued mistreatment of our daughter. What's more, if targeted, my daughter will know how to defend herself.
As I watched my girls walk through the front gates, I ran into another mom leaving school after dropping off her daughter. We exchanged a welcome back hug. She said she was glad to be leave the "clique run" elementary school and principal behind. I was surprised to hear her express the same things my family had experienced at that school. I, too, was glad to leave that school behind, but the bullies from that school have come with us.
This year will be different for a lot of reasons. We are also prepared for whatever the bullies throw at us. We will not tolerate their continued mistreatment of our daughter. What's more, if targeted, my daughter will know how to defend herself.
Monday, August 18, 2008
"I Kissed a Girl..." #$%@^%!!!!!
Okay. We don't have ipods and video games and all the gadgets kids have to have these days. I know, I am probably a bit old fashioned, by I can't stand to see kids "connected to electronic gadgets" and tuned out of life. As long as I am the caregiver in my family, I chose to avoid these "teen" items.
So, you can imagine how shocked I was to hear my girls singing what seemed like a lovely song in perfect harmony "I kissed a girl... My boyfriend don't mind..." #@$%*(&^%$@!!!!!! "Whoa!" What did you just sing? To my horror they repeated it exactly as I'd just heard it. I was absolutely sure I had misheard and ask, "Who sings it?" The response is "Katy Perry." $#@@^%%$#@!!! And of course the last question: "WHERE DID YOU HEAR THAT
SONG?!!"
The bottom line is that they heard it somewhere. The song is apparently number 9 on the charts. I explained to my girls how INAPPROPRIATE the song was and told them that I never want to hear that song again. However, once heard, the damage is done. It infuriates me that an artist would put such rubbish out there. This could have been a great song with a positive message instead of pushing bisexualism on the tender age group it is aimed at. It is truly shameful.
Saturday, August 16, 2008
Texas Teachers to Carry Guns to School
That was the string of words that scrolled across the TV screen this morning as I watched the morning news sipping on a cup of coffee. I had one of those reactions that almost caused a 2nd degree burn on my lap!
In disbelief, I logged on to the Internet and sure enough, Reuters reports that a school district in Northern Texas has approved teachers carrying guns to school with no objections from parents. The report also went on to say that with the shootings in schools around the nation, there has been a call for both teachers and students to take guns to school. Are they crazy?!!!!!
Who in their right mind thinks it is a good idea for students and teachers to take guns to school?!!! Where will the teachers keep the guns so that they are not stolen? How will teachers keep the guns from being found and possibly discharged accidentally by curious children?
What about the psychological evaluation of the teachers who are carrying guns to school? Let's face it, there are days when our kids come home and report that the teacher completely lost it in class. Why do our teachers flip out in class? Because our children disrespect them all day long. Our lack of parenting has turned our teachers into expensive babysitters. I don't even want to think about what will happen when stressed out teachers snap and pull out a gun in class!
Who will be responsible for policing the influx of guns onto our school campuses? Next, shall we outlaw locker searches? Might as well, since they are designed to keep guns OUT of our schools. Am I the only one who sees that this is a really BAD idea???????
In disbelief, I logged on to the Internet and sure enough, Reuters reports that a school district in Northern Texas has approved teachers carrying guns to school with no objections from parents. The report also went on to say that with the shootings in schools around the nation, there has been a call for both teachers and students to take guns to school. Are they crazy?!!!!!
Who in their right mind thinks it is a good idea for students and teachers to take guns to school?!!! Where will the teachers keep the guns so that they are not stolen? How will teachers keep the guns from being found and possibly discharged accidentally by curious children?
What about the psychological evaluation of the teachers who are carrying guns to school? Let's face it, there are days when our kids come home and report that the teacher completely lost it in class. Why do our teachers flip out in class? Because our children disrespect them all day long. Our lack of parenting has turned our teachers into expensive babysitters. I don't even want to think about what will happen when stressed out teachers snap and pull out a gun in class!
Who will be responsible for policing the influx of guns onto our school campuses? Next, shall we outlaw locker searches? Might as well, since they are designed to keep guns OUT of our schools. Am I the only one who sees that this is a really BAD idea???????
Thursday, August 14, 2008
International Bullies & Olympic Bullies
If you've been watching the news lately, you're aware that during the Olympics Opening Day, Russia invaded the democratic country of Georgia. Nations of the world are ultimate bullies with weapons of mass destruction at their disposal. It is truly frightening.
Many nations around the world view the United States as a big bully. Truth be told, governments are run by people. I have heard many people say that bullying is a fact of life in the animal world of which we are a part. Even so, does that make bullying acceptable somehow? I think not. The human species has the ability to reason and with it has the ability to exercise self-control.
Self-control is something that the Spanish team was unable to exhibit as it posed for an advertisement taunting the Chinese team in a show of extreme distaste. On the flip side, I was humbled by Michael Phelps leaning over the pool to shake the hand of the defeated Frenchman who with his teammates talked smack all week about the U.S. swim team. Way to go Michael! You do your country proud!
Many nations around the world view the United States as a big bully. Truth be told, governments are run by people. I have heard many people say that bullying is a fact of life in the animal world of which we are a part. Even so, does that make bullying acceptable somehow? I think not. The human species has the ability to reason and with it has the ability to exercise self-control.
Self-control is something that the Spanish team was unable to exhibit as it posed for an advertisement taunting the Chinese team in a show of extreme distaste. On the flip side, I was humbled by Michael Phelps leaning over the pool to shake the hand of the defeated Frenchman who with his teammates talked smack all week about the U.S. swim team. Way to go Michael! You do your country proud!
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